You Can't Take A Bottle If You're Sucking Your Thumb

My son loves his hands. Loves them. I've never seen anyone as fascinated with his hands as he is. Put something even remotely close to the vicinity of his tiny little arms and it will soon be the property of Declan James. I'm counting down the days until it's cool enough to put him to sleep in his night shirts, fully equipped with long sleeves and mittens; it's a successful morning if he wakes up without some new scratch on his cheeks.

The trouble is, Declan also loves his bottles. And believe me, he lets me know if it's been too long since he's had a play date with his friend The Bottle. If I don't catch his hunger cues quickly enough, soon he's in a full blown frenzy. (You'd think we'd never fed this boy, the way he screams sometimes. I'm going to need two jobs to survive his adolescence.) So there I am, throwing two scoops of enfamil goodness into four ounces of water at warp speed, holding on for dear life to the last strands of my sanity while Declan screams like someone is yanking his finger nails out.

And when it's finally mixed and ready, I can't even get it into his mouth, because what's there instead? His thumb. He sucks that thing like it's going to give him manna if he works hard enough. All the while, he's glaring up at me like I've personally betrayed him-- like I'm the one keeping the bottle from him.

If you'd just move your hand, I could give you what you really want, son.

I wonder how often God thinks this about us. How often do we cling to the things we think we want-- the things we're sure will satisfy us-- only to be left in a hungry frenzy? And how often do we cast accusations at the heavens, wondering how the God who loves us could leave us in want?

Maybe we're left in want because we turn away what we need. Maybe we come up empty time and time again because we're too distracted with our thumbs to be able to take a bottle.

Flashing The Birdman and Good Poops

On July 1, 2012 we were blessed to welcome 6 lbs and 5 oz of Declan James goodness into the world. Unless you have been hiding under a rock in some remote, third world country, you've seen at least one or two of the millions of pictures Matt has posted. (Even Lydia, who has been in third world countries noticed.) What you haven't seen is the other son Matt and I brought home. World, meet the Birdman.

About twelve hours after bringing Declan home we noticed him-- the alter ego-- the Birdman. He strikes every three hours or so and doesn't leave until he gets a bottle. The Birdman is relentless; he sucks anything in neck's reach until he hones in on his enfamil filled query. Binkies (or pacies, depending on what part of the country you're from apparently), fingers, arms, even Matt's nose. (That last one was actually pretty funny to watch.)

I blame the Birdman for very little peace in the Dunham household the past two weeks, but I also credit him with the near two pounds Declan gained in two weeks' time. Well done, Birdman.

Life has been pretty crazy since bringing Declan home, but we wouldn't trade a moment of it. Everything has changed. The way we sleep (or don't sleep), the way we eat, the times we relax (and don't)-- they're all different. Even the things we talk about are drastically different.

For example, before Declan I, for some reason (and I'm embarrassed to admit this), hated to say the word "poop." I hated it. I blushed every time I had to say it. I would use code words like "number two" and "the p word."

This morning, upon hearing that Declan had a normal bowel movement, I exclaimed to Matt "Good poops! Good poops!" That's the best way to describe how my life has changed.

The reason I was so excited for "good poops!" was because Declan's tummy had not been taking well to Similac formula. The poor guy was in a good amount of pain after nearly every feeding. We tried switching to a sensitive stomach version, different burping positions, and even diluting his bottles with a bit of water. In the end it was a little karo syrup and enfamil that did the trick. Maybe only Declan was more excited than I was.

So that's what's mostly been going on with the Dunham family. Declan flashes me the birdman to indicate he's hungry. Mom and Dad respond accordingly. Sleep. Process. Repeat. Praise the Lord!

One Week!

It is hard to believe a week has gone by so quick! Declan is doing great and we are so blessed to have him in our lives. Though we are getting less sleep, we are receiving so much more in return from this gift from God!

Captain Adorable!

Babies are so cute when they sleep

Trying to stay cool from the heat

First week of an exciting adventure ahead

Is that a smile I see?

On his one week birthaversary as Val calls it, we took Declan out for his first fun family adventure*! We headed over to Aunt Rebecca and Uncle Matt's house and enjoyed time with family. This was the first time the three cousins were together and I am sure the first of many to come! What a blessing to have family right down the street.

Rebecca with Hailey

Two Generations!

Lucas is getting so big!

The Cooper Family

The Dunham Family

I would be remiss if I didn't mention what a blessing it has been to have my mother-in-law Kathy and sister-in-law Brittany in town! They have been such a help around the house. Before we ever went home from the hospital they went back to the house to organize for us. We have had amazing meals each day and the sink has been clear of dishes. My father-in-law Shawn will be here by tomorrow and then my parents get in next weekend. What a blessing! Thanks Kathy and Brittany for all your hard work!

*"Fun Family Adventure" trademark of Mark Appleton

Things I've Learned About Being A Mom

There is no such thing as easing into motherhood. There just isn't. You can babysit and take courses and read books for all nine months, and some of it will be helpful, but it isn't motherhood. For the twelve hours before Declan was born, I was completely freaking out. Partially because I was about to push a bowling ball esque bundle of joy out of myself, and partially because I had suddenly been robbed of the last two weeks before my due date. And, though I didn't know it until last Saturday, I had been dearly counting on those last two weeks.

But after a whole week of motherhood under my belt, I can honestly say that time wouldn't have made a difference. Alright, it may have given me opportunity to clean my house a little more, but I wouldn't have been any more prepared for this crazy journey then than I was last week. Motherhood, more than anything else, is learning a lot as you go, learning to let go, enjoying the little things, and, whenever possible, seizing the opportunity to shower.

Here are a list of things I've learned about being a mom so far.

1. Swaddling is harder than it looks. I suddenly have tons of respect for the folks down at Taco Bell. Even with the "swaddling made easy" velcro version, I'm pretty terrible. So thing learned number one is this: Let your husband swaddle the baby whenever possible.

2. My dishes probably won't all be done at once again after my mom leaves.

3. Learn to ingest caffeine in some form. I personally hate coffee. I wish I'd trained myself better.

4. Sleep when he lets you sleep.

5. You know how on movies they have that cute moment when baby boys let loose mid diaper change, and it usually catches an unexpecting parent in the face? That can actually happen. Multiple times in one diaper change even. No one is safe.

6. I was a shower glutton before Declan. Five minutes under lukewarm running water is a treasure these days.

7. Babies do not understand, nor do they care, how cute an outfit is. Bodily functions will still happen. If you plan to show him off in aforementioned cute outfit, wait about ten minutes before "look how cute my baby is" time to change him.

8. Getting a baby to burp is harder than it looks.

9. Regular poop is not even a third as gross as meconium is.

10. You do not get to choose what your *mom voice will be. Mine sounds like a bad Mickey Mouse impersonation. Declan is going to be really confused the first time he sees a Disney movie.

*mom voice: the ridiculous voice a mom uses, for some irrational reason, when addressing her child.

A Father's Perspective

Greeting from Daddy!

What a month it has been! Here I sit, one eye on the computer, the other on my precious son Declan. God has blessed us with the greatest gift ever and we are just taking it in one day at a time. I want to thank everyone who has been praying for us throughout Val's pregnancy. It wasn't always a smooth journey, but we made it to the end with a beautiful and healthy son! I want to take a few minutes to share my perspective on the crazy 48 hours that was this past weekend!

As many of you know, my good friend Tim Lester was married this past Saturday, and I was the best man. Now for months we have been praying that Declan stay inside mommy's belly past June 30th. Well, our prayers were answered, but only by 3 1/2 hours! It was really hard for Val not to come with me to the wedding but we figured it was best. Definitely the right decision! I left Friday morning, the 29th, and headed for Lewistown, PA, six hours from home. There was no way Declan would come 2 1/2 weeks early, right?

Wrong! We all had a great time Friday night at the rehearsal dinner, reminiscing about old times. I texted back and forth with Val and she seemed to be doing well. I figured the weekend would proceed without incident. At 5 a.m. the next morning my phone went off. It was Val, and that could only mean one thing! She was experiencing contractions about 8 minutes apart. It seemed Declan didn't want to wait until July.

I don't think I would have made it through the weekend without Dan and David. Dan immediately calmed me down and suggested we go out for breakfast. We woke up David and headed to Burger King. We had a few laughs and prayed about the situation. Val had made it clear that she wanted me to stay in PA and wait to see if the contractions would slow down. I didn't know what to do. I eventually had David record me giving my toast in case I could not be there for the reception. Soon after, I decided I had to head back and texted Val to let her know. A few minutes later, my sister Rachel called me and encouraged me to stay. She thought we still had a lot of time to work with. Trouble was, the wedding was not until 3:00 and it was going to take me six hours to drive back. After some prayer and thought, I decided to stay at least through the ceremony. 

As the day went on, things stayed status quo with Val and I started to calm down a bit. I knew she was in good hands with my sisters. We took a lot of pictures and then got ready for the ceremony. So many emotions were running through me. Half my mind was on this incredible moment in my best friend's life and half of me was focused on Val and Declan. The ceremony was beautiful and I managed to transfer the rings to Tim and Megan without dropping them. As we exited the sanctuary I immediately checked my phone for an update. It turns out my sisters brought Val to the clinic to get checked out and she hadn't dilated any further. It seemed as though things were slowing down and I would be able to stay the night in PA. I had already cried a bit during the ceremony with all the emotion running through me. After reading this text message, I lost it completely. I just kept saying to anyone who would hear, "God is good! God is good!" while showing them the text message. My parents and grandma were also at the wedding, and I broke down in my mom's arms. Little did I know, the craziness was just beginning!

After more pictures, we headed to the reception. I was so happy to be able to give my toast in person. I can't describe to you how happy Tim and Megan are together! One of the stories I told was how my parents and grandmothers considered Tim a part of the family. They would often call and ask how he was doing followed shortly by asking if he had found a girl. What a moment it was when I was able to tell them, "Yes he has, and her name is Megan!" After a year of marriage, it is so cool to see two people in love about to start their own adventure. Marriage is such a blessing. 

About halfway through the reception, Val texted me that things were progressing again. I decided my job was done in PA and it was time to be with my wife. I was probably crazy for staying as long as I did! I was tempted to stay two more hours until the end of the reception, but to add to their day of saving my butt, Dan and David convinced me to leave sooner than later. I said my goodbyes, packed my stuff, and hit the road for the longest 6 hours of my life!

I left PA around 8:00 or so and my ETA in Christiansburg was around 2am. I kept praying to God, asking Him to keep Declan from entering this world for at least six more hours. My poor sweetie started experiencing excruciating pain and Rachel brought her to the hospital around 11:00. I was relieved to hear when she received the epidural. That made life much happier for her! I battled some road weariness, but finally arrived at the hospital around 1:45 in the morning. Craig met me outside and brought me into the room where I was able to finally see the love of my life. It had been a long 24 hours but I was finally with my sweetheart. I figured it would be a while still, but Declan once again had other plans! Less than two hours later, he was on his way into the world.

Experiencing the birth of my first child was incredible. I can't begin to describe my emotions and feelings. I am sure it wasn't the most pleasant 20 minutes of Val's life, but once that baby boy came out, it was exhilarating for both of us! He was so beautiful from the moment I set my eyes on him. The moment was surreal. I couldn't believe I was finally a dad. I had been looking forward to this for a long time. God's timing was so perfect last weekend and I am still in awe!

We enjoyed the next few days at the hospital with our baby boy. We were blessed with many visitors, all eager to see the boy they had been praying about for so long. Five days later and we are learning more and more each day about our little guy. There are many challenges ahead but we know God will guide us through each one. Thank you again for all your support and prayers. We hope you get to see Declan soon! Please come visit us in Christiansburg anytime. I will leave you with more pictures of Declan and some from the wedding. God bless!

Rehearsal

Recording the toast just in case!

The groom

Mr. and Mrs. Lester

Daddy and Pop-pops!

I wouldn't have survived without these two!

Grandparents again!

Great grandma!

Thomas and Jay

Sara and David

The T and the Little D

Our little froggy!

On his way home!

Grandma McGinnis!

Being silly with Declan

A Hokie already!

Happy Fourth!

Had to add one of Lucas. After all, he is the ringleader!

Happy Family!

Rachel and Craig have been such a blessing!

Three generations

So cute!