Here's To Henry

This morning around 9:30, I got a knock on my door from our across the street neighbors. They asked if we had a cat, and, very hesitantly (I thought she was going to complain about his running through their lawn or something), told her that we did. She asked if he was a very large cat, and I instinctively told her no. (Henry is huge, but I've known him since he was born, so I forget sometimes). After I remembered that Henry is, in fact, pretty fat, I told her yes.

She told me that she found him on the side of the road, very badly hurt after apparently being hit by a car. I started to rush out the door and she stopped me; she'd already brought him to the vet, and he told her there wasn't much hope. At this I realized I was crying, which made her cry. But praise the Lord for the sort of kindness it takes to rush a stranger's cat to the vet.

I won't detail the gory mess I found in the crate they said Henry was in; this was not my Henry. It couldn't be. But it was. I started crying again (dang it), and they helped me get him ready to drive over to the VT animal hospital, where they could offer him better care.

I stayed there with him as long as I could, and I held my poor furry baby's paw the whole way over there. He was in so much pain. The vet said he was in shock.

I don't really know why I'm writing this. I guess just because I'm not sure if he's got a realistic chance of making it, and when Matt and I went to visit him tonight we weren't allowed to touch him, so this is the best way I know how to say goodbye.

I watched Henry get born. In March of 2011 my roommates and I took in the meanest stray cat you'd ever seen, only to find out that she was pregnant. (She was also apparently not a stray, as we found out several months later.) We named her Edgar.

Henry was the third of four kittens. He was the only black and white one, and by the morning you could tell he was going to have the cutest little stripes ever. I knew this was the cat I wanted, and I knew I wanted to name him Henry.

Henry has always hated being held. He is not a cuddler. Even still, he follows you into any room you go into, happy to sit next to you, but rarely on you. He put up with the occasional snuggling I would force on him like a champ.

Henry was a ninja. You have not seen acrobatics until you've seen this cat in action. He could jump about six feet into the air without a running start. He climbed to the top of our screen doors, and would cling to them for dear life even when we opened them. His favorite things to play with (besides mine and Matt's toes!) were our corn hole boards.

Henry is terrified of balloons. Matt got me a big silver balloon for my birthday last year, and it took us three days to realize the reason Henry would not leave our bedroom was because he was afraid of the balloon. He was also really afraid of the life size cut out of "The Rock" I gave Matt for his 26th birthday. (Henry probably really hated our birthdays.)

Henry loved to slow blink at you, which is a sign of contentment for a cat. It was his way of saying "we're cool." I did that with him last night, and I'm really happy about that now.

On Saturday, I caught Henry eating mulch. He spit it out and looked up at me like he was embarrassed. It was awesome, and I wanted to share that but never did, because... well he's just a cat, and who really would have cared?

But Henry is my cat. He's been mine literally from the moment he was born. I've gone from holding him in the palm of my hand to hardly being able to pick him up because he's so heavy. All I want to do right now is give him a big hug and kiss and force the snuggles I know he secretly loves on him.

I can't do that, though, so this is what I'm doing instead. I love you, Henry!

Why Do Bad Things Happen If God Is Good?

One of my biggest pet peeves is when Christians, posed with the question "why do bad things happen if there is a good God?" respond in the following manner: "Even though we only see the negative effects of (insert tragic situation here), maybe God is using this for good. He has a bigger plan."

I think that's a shallow answer-- one that does not really reflect Biblical teachings that accurately nor reflects the general character of God. I think this is something that Christians hear long enough, attached with a proof texted version of Romans 8:28, and eventually begin to regurgitate, not necessarily out of laziness, but out of fear. Because what if we really thought about that question? What if we really, honestly considered how such bad things can happen in this world if God is simultaneously sovereign and good? Without our go to "it's secretly a good thing" mojo, we might get uncomfortable pondering that question.

I'll never forget being a senior in high school, relatively new to my faith, and having a good natured, mostly joking conversation with a friend, who isn't a Christian. And suddenly the conversation got very real, very quickly, and before I knew it, he was citing incidents of children who die of cancer and people who starve to death and honestly asking me, "where's your God now?" And I had no idea what to say, because suddenly thinking that God intended these things for any purpose seemed far fetched-- a convenient assumption made to answer a hard question.

This in mind, I think of the account of Adam and Eve very differently than I used to. It seems straight forward enough: God makes paradise. God puts man in paradise. Man breaks law. God punishes man. Boom. Genesis.

But I don't think that's exactly accurate. I don't think God put us all in a world where tragedy runs rampant because He was angry and wanted to punish us. I think God was angry because He knew the result of sin-- He foresaw the terrible things that could and would happen in a fallen, flawed world-- the tragedy that would strike the people He loves. This world, as it is, is not something God ever intended. Death was not an original part of God's plan, but rather a result of sin. God hates the senseless things that happen here more than we do. I believe that.

And so when I see people using a tragedy like the one that occurred today to say either "we may not understand it, but God knows what He's doing," as if this was something He intended-- a blessing in disguise-- or "this is a form of God's punishment for kicking Him out of our schools," it makes me sick.

God hates death. And He doesn't joyfully dole it out to advance His kingdom (either as a blessing or as a punishment.)

I'm praying hard tonight for the people of Newtown.

Let's Uplift Barack Obama In Prayer

President Barack Obama has been re-elected as the leader of this nation for the next four years. Okay, take a moment of silence to react to this.

You good? Good. Now that we've all taken a moment, I have a few things on my mind regarding this issue.

I have seen posts on the wonderful social networking site, affectionately known as facebook, that span the spectrum of "God placed Obama in office!" to "The anti-Christ has come." Such comments demonstrate the fact that we are a country divided-- one that cannot function holistically. A presidency has turned into four years of blind faith by one group of people and four years (okay, probably more than four) of unabashed criticism by another.

I voted for Mitt Romney. Am I disappointed that he didn't win? Obviously. Any of you who remember me as the pigheaded tenth grader who wore a t-shirt to school that read "Friends Don't Let Friends Vote Kerry" in 2004 aren't shocked. I didn't think Romney was an ideal candidate. I didn't agree with him in every regard. However, all things considered, I thought he was hands down the better man for the job. I don't like what Obama has done with America in the past four years. I have seen no financial improvement, I clearly disagree with him in a moral sense, and, I'm sorry (I'm not sorry), but he didn't kill Osama Bin Laden.

That being said, I do not think that Barack Obama is an evil man. I fear for our country, as I did when he took office four years ago, but I can't get behind people who are honestly marking him as the end all and be all of not only this nation, but the world at large. I can't get behind people who will hold a personal and far reaching grudge for the next four years. I'm going to roll my eyes at the folks who cry "lazy! get back to work!" when he takes ten minutes to present his March Madness bracket on ESPN this spring.

President Obama is our leader, and though we are not called to agree with him, we are called to pray for him. To my friends who are hoping for a further decline of our nation over the next four years, simply so you can point a finger and exclaim "must've been all that March Madness getting in the way," shame on you. What a proud, stubborn attitude that is. It was our duty as Americans to vote yesterday, and it our charge as Christ followers to uplift our president in prayer today. You can't honestly pray for somebody you're too busy hating.

On the other hand, I have also seen a ridiculous amount of posts from people who are going as far as saying "Obama wouldn't be in office if God didn't want him there." Preposterous. If that notion held true, Adam and Eve wouldn't have eaten of the tree of life, people wouldn't be dying of cancer, and Nickelback would have stopped making music already. Yes, God is sovereign, but that is not to say, by any means, that everything that happens here is because He willed it. I think there are an inordinate amount of people, particularly of my generation, who herald Obama as what this country needs simply because it's trendy. That makes me really mad-- not because we differ in opinion, but because the former is an uninformed opinion.

Does that mean I think everyone who voted for Obama was not informed? Of course not. I have many friends who were completely informed and voted him in anyway. To that I say, let's agree to disagree. Not, "we'll see who's right in four years," or "you're going to be sorry!"Those are proud and, frankly, anti-American sentiments. I don't hope for the fall of this country merely for the opportunity to say "Told you so."

I hope you don't either.

Happy November!

Once again, life has been a little too crazy and time has been a bit too scarce. Finally, however, both my husband and Declan are napping, and I'm motivated enough to update!

I know some people already know this, but some do not: Two weeks ago, Matt and I came to the decision that I should put in my two week notice at work. As such, yesterday was my last day, and starting on Monday I'll be at home with Declan.

There are several reasons we decided this was the best thing for our family at the time, and none of those reasons are directly related to the job. I loved the job, I loved the people I worked with, and I loved the kids. I'm going to miss it there a lot. BUT, that being said, there's not a doubt in my mind that quitting was the right decision.

Declan has essentially been sick since he started day care-- sometimes more critically sick than others, but he's not been completely healthy since starting. Because of that, I think he was having a hard time sleeping at night-- especially in his crib. While he was not exactly showing signs of wanting to sleep through the night anyway, it seemed that every time he did, shortly after he'd get really congested and be up all night again. As you can imagine, that was not exactly conducive to a steady night's sleep for me.

So, not only was Declan miserable because he was sick, but I've been absolutely exhausted between working from 8-5, getting home by 6, taking care of Declan, attempting to make dinner, getting up all night with him again, and then waking up at 6 to get him ready for the day. While I was adjusting to the insanity, these adjustments meant that I was starting to cheat on Declan a little bit.

I didn't have the sort of energy I wanted to when I came home, and play time with my little buddy was starting to turn into watching him on his play mat while I tried to stay awake. I would get frustrated more easily when he was fussy. I was not enjoying my son like I should have been, and that hit me really hard one day. I can't think of any amount of money that is worth missing my son's first and only babyhood, but what I was getting paid was not even close to making it worth it. Despite the fact that I was getting a discount on childcare, by the time that deduction came out, plus taxes, I was making a little over three hundred dollars every two weeks. Every little bit helps, but for the amount of time and energy that I was putting into the job, the time I was missing with Declan, and the frequency with which Declan was getting sick, it stopped being worth it to me.

So, despite the fact that I already miss the people at Kidz Connection, I am entirely at peace with the decision I made-- that Matt and I both made. On top of everything else, this is Matt's first year running his own classroom full of seventh graders, and that in itself is a monumental task. I know that having someone at home to keep things grounded here (and to keep dinner on the table and dishes out of the sink, haha) is going to be a big help to him.

I've actually had a few people ask me what I'm going to do with all of my spare time now. Hah! That's laughable. Declan is a full time job, and I'll happily take that on. I can't wait to get him on a more regulated schedule. I also can't wait to clean my house, because it hasn't been entirely organized since I started working. I'm also taking grad school classes, so it will be nice to finally be able to focus on those a little more.

Also, as crazy as it is, I'm going to keep trying to make something happen with my writing. I'm in the middle of editing Ridley F. Scott, and hope to have that done by the end of 2012.

The Lord is good, and my strength comes from Him alone. He's been teaching me that joy is not related to happiness, and that perseverance does not come from energy. I'm thankful He never gives up on me.

Remember Me?

So, between being a mom, working full time, and taking two grad school classes, I've finally found time to update!

Life is absolutely crazy right now, but I can't complain. I have the most beautiful baby boy; when I'm feeling overwhelmed with the monumental task of being his mom, I watch his face light up with a smile and feel peace again. Praise God for this beautiful boy and this crazy, kind of messy, but totally worth it time in life.

I started working at a daycare a little over a month ago. It's a huge blessing in some ways; I get to bring Declan to work with me, which means I have a lunch date every day. Plus, I get a discount (which is nice, but barely puts a dent in the money suck that is daycare.)

I work with the three's class as an assistant teacher. Three year olds are crazy. I don't know what you've heard about this age group, but my kids are absolutely nuts (in mostly good ways). Younger three's are also vastly different than older three's. One of my kids can write his name; another can't hold a crayon, haha.

Things I've learned so far about working with this age group:

They want bandaids for everything. "Miss Balerie (they can't say Valerie), I bumped my finger on the table. I need a bandaid." "Miss Balerie, my finger is read. That means I get a bandaid." Essentially, 'hey, my finger exists. That merits a bandaid.'

They tattletale. About everything. Everything. "Heee-eeey, he looked at me!" (No joke; I hear that about ten times a day.) "Heee-eeey, he's talking!" That long, sing-songy hey has become my least favorite sound on the planet. Every time I hear it, I want to tell them that I don't actually care. Even a little bit.

Everyone is "he." (to some kids anyway.) About two or three of them don't understand the concept of "she," so everyone becomes "he."

If you can't think of a way to make them listen, start counting to three. Not sure what they think is going to happen when you get past two, but things get real in the mind of a three year old when you start to count.

They're sneaky. Wicked sneaky.

They actually do eat playdough.

For the most part, I feel incredibly blessed to have a job that I really do like. I wish it paid a little more, haha, but you can't have everything I guess. I miss being at home with Declan more than I can say, most days, but I'm lucky he's just down the hall from me. I wish he wasn't so exposed to so many germs all the time, but I know he'll build up his immune system more and more as time goes on. I am so tired all of the time that some days I feel pretty certain I can't juggle everything, but I'm getting through each day on God's provision and strength. The people I work with are pretty cool, and I'm attached to the kids a lot. There are definitely both pro's and con's to life lately, but mostly I just feel blessed.

I would feel more blessed if I got to sleep in on of these days, haha. Maybe eighteen years from now.

Life is busy but God is good!

Greetings from daddy! I wanted to give you an update on the craziness that is our life at the moment and how God is taking us through it one day at a time. With Val and I both working full time and Declan changing by the day, we are in need of God's strength more than ever! God is so faithful to answer prayer and He is really guiding us and helping us adjust to all of this transition.

I knew coming into this school year that my job would be a big challenge. I was really anxious about getting into the classroom and the first six weeks were really tough. Thankfully God has brought me through the hardest part of the job and things are starting to settle in. Many of you know I am not the most organized individual! The planning part of teaching is really hard for me and something I need to keep improving. I am really enjoying my students. They are a handful but are a lot of fun to work with. I think things will continue to get better as the year goes on. I will be praying all year to see if this is where I need to be long term. I am just thankful I can now come home at night and for the most part, leave work at work and let home be home. Praise God!

My son is getting so big! He is starting to smile and interact with those around him. What a blessing parenthood has been. Declan looks the same age as his cousin Hailey who is 4 months older than him! I love just watching Declan take in his surroundings, with his eyes wide and mouth open. It is hard to believe he will be three months old on Monday. Val has been such a trooper, taking most of the night feedings so I can get some sleep before school. We are hoping Declan will start sleeping through the night on a consistent basis soon. Please pray that he does!

Val is enjoying her job and really likes the people she works with. That being said, it is really tiring for her to run around with three year olds all day and then take care of Declan as well. Add two graduate classes and she is a busy woman! Pray for Val to have strength each day and for God to use her to impact the kids she works with. Pray that I will have the strength to help her as much as possible to lighten her load.

My mom and dad are in this weekend for Lucas' birthday so we are enjoying some quality family time. Hopefully in a few years they will move down here and we will see each other more often. I will leave you with a bunch of pictures (Grandma Dunham I know you have been waiting a while!). Enjoy and God bless!

Why People Think I'm More Ethnic Than I Am

While I was pregnant, my good friend Justin, who is notorious for saying moderately ridiculous things (that's very understated), told me that he was going to refer to Declan (Dek-lin) as Day-klahn. We all laughed. Hard.

Here's the thing: People actually call Declan (Dek-lin) Day-klahn. Like... a lot of people. Two days ago I got a phone call from the billing department at my obgyn's office. The phone conversation went something like this:

Billing Department: Valerie, please.

Valerie Please: This is Valerie

Billing: (in a comically surprised tone) Oh, haha. Okay. (I've since come to recognize this as the point in the conversation when the person realizes I'm white.) Valerie, I'm calling about Day-klahn's circumcision.

Quick aside: Not the best way to start a conversation with a new mother... or any mother, really. She'd yet to identify herself as with the billing department, and so my first thought is "oh, crap, they messed it up."

Valerie Please: Okay...

Billing: What's Day-klahn's date of birth?

Valerie Please: July 1st... what did you say this was regarding again?

Billing: (very slowly, as if this is a stupid question) Day-klahn's circum-cision

Valerie Please: Yes ma'am, I got that, but unless they're going to do it again I need you to be a little more specific.

Billing: I'm calling about the circumcision they did.

Valerie Please: Okay...?

Billing: Well, we need to bill you for that.

Valerie Please: Oh, great. That's all I needed to know. And by the way, it's Dek-lin.

Billing: (As if this changes everything) Oooooh!

This experience is not a far cry from most other "I'm trying to pronounce this kid's name right" experiences. For example, I can always tell which nurse I'm talking to at the pediatricians office based on how they say his name. One woman calls him "Dee-klin" and another sticks with the classic "Day-Klahn."

I had to go in to get his belly button checked out earlier this week (it seriously looks like he has an elephant trunk, but apparently this is normal), and I wish I'd had a camera when the nurse popped into the waiting room and called for "Day-klahn"

Nurse: Day-klahn?

Me: That's us

Nurse: (nonchalantly peering into the car seat, presumably to investigate Day-klahn's race) It's not pronounced Day-klahn, is it?

Me: Nope, it's Dek-lin. But Day-klahn is starting to grow on me, so call him whatever you like. (She started calling him Dek-lin after that.)

I knew I was setting Declan up for a lot of "can you spell that?" moments throughout his life, but I never anticipated the great Day-klahn Debacle of 2012. I kind of think of it as an added bonus.

I will be completely unsurprised, however, if he decides to start going by DJ by the time he hits third grade.

On Becoming Baby Dumb

I have finally found a spare fifteen minutes during which Declan is allowing me to utilize both of my hands for something other than patting his back, fetching his binky, or rubbing his stomach. This free time was hiding behind sleep props. Many, many sleep props.

A sleep prop, as defined in the popular Baby Wise books, is a way to get your infant to sleep unnaturally: Rocking, bouncing, white noise-- essentially, anything other than putting your baby in a crib and saying "see you in a few hours, son." It's artificial sleep, if you will.

A few weeks ago, I was all about this baby wise system. It made sense. I didn't want Declan to rely on rocking or singing to get to sleep. He needed to learn to do it the good old fashioned way and he needed to learn immediately.

I look back on that phase of my life with fondness now. I look back and think "aw, that's cute."

Cute? Yes. Realistic? Maybe for some fictitious baby gift wrapped and delivered exactly on his due date by the stork. But not for Declan. Not even close. Currently Declan is swaddled and sleeping in a vibrating bouncer cradle with a white noise making machine positioned a foot from his ear. He is sucking away happily at his binky and he hasn't cried in quite some time.

That's right, folks, we're using enough sleep props now to start our own off Broadway production. And I'm happy with it. If that's not Baby Wise (I've read the books-- it's not) then call me Baby Dumb. I'll gladly wear that title. I'll also gladly clean my house, read a book, and sleep at night.

Maybe the Baby Wise system is the smartest way to do things. Maybe I'll be kicking myself in about a month. I lost enough sleep to not really care that much, though. In fact, there is Biblical evidence that even sweet, eight pound six ounce baby Jesus needed a sleep prop or two. First account of swaddling clothes? The Bible. And correct me if I'm wrong, but was Jesus laying in a manger or a crib? The song isn't called "Away In A Flat Surfaced, Firm Mattressed Crib."

Moral of the story? Now that we've given in to all the wrong ways to put Declan to sleep, he's actually sleeping and so are we. And the Dunham family lived happily ever after.

You Can't Take A Bottle If You're Sucking Your Thumb

My son loves his hands. Loves them. I've never seen anyone as fascinated with his hands as he is. Put something even remotely close to the vicinity of his tiny little arms and it will soon be the property of Declan James. I'm counting down the days until it's cool enough to put him to sleep in his night shirts, fully equipped with long sleeves and mittens; it's a successful morning if he wakes up without some new scratch on his cheeks.

The trouble is, Declan also loves his bottles. And believe me, he lets me know if it's been too long since he's had a play date with his friend The Bottle. If I don't catch his hunger cues quickly enough, soon he's in a full blown frenzy. (You'd think we'd never fed this boy, the way he screams sometimes. I'm going to need two jobs to survive his adolescence.) So there I am, throwing two scoops of enfamil goodness into four ounces of water at warp speed, holding on for dear life to the last strands of my sanity while Declan screams like someone is yanking his finger nails out.

And when it's finally mixed and ready, I can't even get it into his mouth, because what's there instead? His thumb. He sucks that thing like it's going to give him manna if he works hard enough. All the while, he's glaring up at me like I've personally betrayed him-- like I'm the one keeping the bottle from him.

If you'd just move your hand, I could give you what you really want, son.

I wonder how often God thinks this about us. How often do we cling to the things we think we want-- the things we're sure will satisfy us-- only to be left in a hungry frenzy? And how often do we cast accusations at the heavens, wondering how the God who loves us could leave us in want?

Maybe we're left in want because we turn away what we need. Maybe we come up empty time and time again because we're too distracted with our thumbs to be able to take a bottle.

Flashing The Birdman and Good Poops

On July 1, 2012 we were blessed to welcome 6 lbs and 5 oz of Declan James goodness into the world. Unless you have been hiding under a rock in some remote, third world country, you've seen at least one or two of the millions of pictures Matt has posted. (Even Lydia, who has been in third world countries noticed.) What you haven't seen is the other son Matt and I brought home. World, meet the Birdman.

About twelve hours after bringing Declan home we noticed him-- the alter ego-- the Birdman. He strikes every three hours or so and doesn't leave until he gets a bottle. The Birdman is relentless; he sucks anything in neck's reach until he hones in on his enfamil filled query. Binkies (or pacies, depending on what part of the country you're from apparently), fingers, arms, even Matt's nose. (That last one was actually pretty funny to watch.)

I blame the Birdman for very little peace in the Dunham household the past two weeks, but I also credit him with the near two pounds Declan gained in two weeks' time. Well done, Birdman.

Life has been pretty crazy since bringing Declan home, but we wouldn't trade a moment of it. Everything has changed. The way we sleep (or don't sleep), the way we eat, the times we relax (and don't)-- they're all different. Even the things we talk about are drastically different.

For example, before Declan I, for some reason (and I'm embarrassed to admit this), hated to say the word "poop." I hated it. I blushed every time I had to say it. I would use code words like "number two" and "the p word."

This morning, upon hearing that Declan had a normal bowel movement, I exclaimed to Matt "Good poops! Good poops!" That's the best way to describe how my life has changed.

The reason I was so excited for "good poops!" was because Declan's tummy had not been taking well to Similac formula. The poor guy was in a good amount of pain after nearly every feeding. We tried switching to a sensitive stomach version, different burping positions, and even diluting his bottles with a bit of water. In the end it was a little karo syrup and enfamil that did the trick. Maybe only Declan was more excited than I was.

So that's what's mostly been going on with the Dunham family. Declan flashes me the birdman to indicate he's hungry. Mom and Dad respond accordingly. Sleep. Process. Repeat. Praise the Lord!

One Week!

It is hard to believe a week has gone by so quick! Declan is doing great and we are so blessed to have him in our lives. Though we are getting less sleep, we are receiving so much more in return from this gift from God!

Captain Adorable!

Babies are so cute when they sleep

Trying to stay cool from the heat

First week of an exciting adventure ahead

Is that a smile I see?

On his one week birthaversary as Val calls it, we took Declan out for his first fun family adventure*! We headed over to Aunt Rebecca and Uncle Matt's house and enjoyed time with family. This was the first time the three cousins were together and I am sure the first of many to come! What a blessing to have family right down the street.

Rebecca with Hailey

Two Generations!

Lucas is getting so big!

The Cooper Family

The Dunham Family

I would be remiss if I didn't mention what a blessing it has been to have my mother-in-law Kathy and sister-in-law Brittany in town! They have been such a help around the house. Before we ever went home from the hospital they went back to the house to organize for us. We have had amazing meals each day and the sink has been clear of dishes. My father-in-law Shawn will be here by tomorrow and then my parents get in next weekend. What a blessing! Thanks Kathy and Brittany for all your hard work!

*"Fun Family Adventure" trademark of Mark Appleton

Things I've Learned About Being A Mom

There is no such thing as easing into motherhood. There just isn't. You can babysit and take courses and read books for all nine months, and some of it will be helpful, but it isn't motherhood. For the twelve hours before Declan was born, I was completely freaking out. Partially because I was about to push a bowling ball esque bundle of joy out of myself, and partially because I had suddenly been robbed of the last two weeks before my due date. And, though I didn't know it until last Saturday, I had been dearly counting on those last two weeks.

But after a whole week of motherhood under my belt, I can honestly say that time wouldn't have made a difference. Alright, it may have given me opportunity to clean my house a little more, but I wouldn't have been any more prepared for this crazy journey then than I was last week. Motherhood, more than anything else, is learning a lot as you go, learning to let go, enjoying the little things, and, whenever possible, seizing the opportunity to shower.

Here are a list of things I've learned about being a mom so far.

1. Swaddling is harder than it looks. I suddenly have tons of respect for the folks down at Taco Bell. Even with the "swaddling made easy" velcro version, I'm pretty terrible. So thing learned number one is this: Let your husband swaddle the baby whenever possible.

2. My dishes probably won't all be done at once again after my mom leaves.

3. Learn to ingest caffeine in some form. I personally hate coffee. I wish I'd trained myself better.

4. Sleep when he lets you sleep.

5. You know how on movies they have that cute moment when baby boys let loose mid diaper change, and it usually catches an unexpecting parent in the face? That can actually happen. Multiple times in one diaper change even. No one is safe.

6. I was a shower glutton before Declan. Five minutes under lukewarm running water is a treasure these days.

7. Babies do not understand, nor do they care, how cute an outfit is. Bodily functions will still happen. If you plan to show him off in aforementioned cute outfit, wait about ten minutes before "look how cute my baby is" time to change him.

8. Getting a baby to burp is harder than it looks.

9. Regular poop is not even a third as gross as meconium is.

10. You do not get to choose what your *mom voice will be. Mine sounds like a bad Mickey Mouse impersonation. Declan is going to be really confused the first time he sees a Disney movie.

*mom voice: the ridiculous voice a mom uses, for some irrational reason, when addressing her child.

A Father's Perspective

Greeting from Daddy!

What a month it has been! Here I sit, one eye on the computer, the other on my precious son Declan. God has blessed us with the greatest gift ever and we are just taking it in one day at a time. I want to thank everyone who has been praying for us throughout Val's pregnancy. It wasn't always a smooth journey, but we made it to the end with a beautiful and healthy son! I want to take a few minutes to share my perspective on the crazy 48 hours that was this past weekend!

As many of you know, my good friend Tim Lester was married this past Saturday, and I was the best man. Now for months we have been praying that Declan stay inside mommy's belly past June 30th. Well, our prayers were answered, but only by 3 1/2 hours! It was really hard for Val not to come with me to the wedding but we figured it was best. Definitely the right decision! I left Friday morning, the 29th, and headed for Lewistown, PA, six hours from home. There was no way Declan would come 2 1/2 weeks early, right?

Wrong! We all had a great time Friday night at the rehearsal dinner, reminiscing about old times. I texted back and forth with Val and she seemed to be doing well. I figured the weekend would proceed without incident. At 5 a.m. the next morning my phone went off. It was Val, and that could only mean one thing! She was experiencing contractions about 8 minutes apart. It seemed Declan didn't want to wait until July.

I don't think I would have made it through the weekend without Dan and David. Dan immediately calmed me down and suggested we go out for breakfast. We woke up David and headed to Burger King. We had a few laughs and prayed about the situation. Val had made it clear that she wanted me to stay in PA and wait to see if the contractions would slow down. I didn't know what to do. I eventually had David record me giving my toast in case I could not be there for the reception. Soon after, I decided I had to head back and texted Val to let her know. A few minutes later, my sister Rachel called me and encouraged me to stay. She thought we still had a lot of time to work with. Trouble was, the wedding was not until 3:00 and it was going to take me six hours to drive back. After some prayer and thought, I decided to stay at least through the ceremony. 

As the day went on, things stayed status quo with Val and I started to calm down a bit. I knew she was in good hands with my sisters. We took a lot of pictures and then got ready for the ceremony. So many emotions were running through me. Half my mind was on this incredible moment in my best friend's life and half of me was focused on Val and Declan. The ceremony was beautiful and I managed to transfer the rings to Tim and Megan without dropping them. As we exited the sanctuary I immediately checked my phone for an update. It turns out my sisters brought Val to the clinic to get checked out and she hadn't dilated any further. It seemed as though things were slowing down and I would be able to stay the night in PA. I had already cried a bit during the ceremony with all the emotion running through me. After reading this text message, I lost it completely. I just kept saying to anyone who would hear, "God is good! God is good!" while showing them the text message. My parents and grandma were also at the wedding, and I broke down in my mom's arms. Little did I know, the craziness was just beginning!

After more pictures, we headed to the reception. I was so happy to be able to give my toast in person. I can't describe to you how happy Tim and Megan are together! One of the stories I told was how my parents and grandmothers considered Tim a part of the family. They would often call and ask how he was doing followed shortly by asking if he had found a girl. What a moment it was when I was able to tell them, "Yes he has, and her name is Megan!" After a year of marriage, it is so cool to see two people in love about to start their own adventure. Marriage is such a blessing. 

About halfway through the reception, Val texted me that things were progressing again. I decided my job was done in PA and it was time to be with my wife. I was probably crazy for staying as long as I did! I was tempted to stay two more hours until the end of the reception, but to add to their day of saving my butt, Dan and David convinced me to leave sooner than later. I said my goodbyes, packed my stuff, and hit the road for the longest 6 hours of my life!

I left PA around 8:00 or so and my ETA in Christiansburg was around 2am. I kept praying to God, asking Him to keep Declan from entering this world for at least six more hours. My poor sweetie started experiencing excruciating pain and Rachel brought her to the hospital around 11:00. I was relieved to hear when she received the epidural. That made life much happier for her! I battled some road weariness, but finally arrived at the hospital around 1:45 in the morning. Craig met me outside and brought me into the room where I was able to finally see the love of my life. It had been a long 24 hours but I was finally with my sweetheart. I figured it would be a while still, but Declan once again had other plans! Less than two hours later, he was on his way into the world.

Experiencing the birth of my first child was incredible. I can't begin to describe my emotions and feelings. I am sure it wasn't the most pleasant 20 minutes of Val's life, but once that baby boy came out, it was exhilarating for both of us! He was so beautiful from the moment I set my eyes on him. The moment was surreal. I couldn't believe I was finally a dad. I had been looking forward to this for a long time. God's timing was so perfect last weekend and I am still in awe!

We enjoyed the next few days at the hospital with our baby boy. We were blessed with many visitors, all eager to see the boy they had been praying about for so long. Five days later and we are learning more and more each day about our little guy. There are many challenges ahead but we know God will guide us through each one. Thank you again for all your support and prayers. We hope you get to see Declan soon! Please come visit us in Christiansburg anytime. I will leave you with more pictures of Declan and some from the wedding. God bless!

Rehearsal

Recording the toast just in case!

The groom

Mr. and Mrs. Lester

Daddy and Pop-pops!

I wouldn't have survived without these two!

Grandparents again!

Great grandma!

Thomas and Jay

Sara and David

The T and the Little D

Our little froggy!

On his way home!

Grandma McGinnis!

Being silly with Declan

A Hokie already!

Happy Fourth!

Had to add one of Lucas. After all, he is the ringleader!

Happy Family!

Rachel and Craig have been such a blessing!

Three generations

So cute!