Happy November!

Once again, life has been a little too crazy and time has been a bit too scarce. Finally, however, both my husband and Declan are napping, and I'm motivated enough to update!

I know some people already know this, but some do not: Two weeks ago, Matt and I came to the decision that I should put in my two week notice at work. As such, yesterday was my last day, and starting on Monday I'll be at home with Declan.

There are several reasons we decided this was the best thing for our family at the time, and none of those reasons are directly related to the job. I loved the job, I loved the people I worked with, and I loved the kids. I'm going to miss it there a lot. BUT, that being said, there's not a doubt in my mind that quitting was the right decision.

Declan has essentially been sick since he started day care-- sometimes more critically sick than others, but he's not been completely healthy since starting. Because of that, I think he was having a hard time sleeping at night-- especially in his crib. While he was not exactly showing signs of wanting to sleep through the night anyway, it seemed that every time he did, shortly after he'd get really congested and be up all night again. As you can imagine, that was not exactly conducive to a steady night's sleep for me.

So, not only was Declan miserable because he was sick, but I've been absolutely exhausted between working from 8-5, getting home by 6, taking care of Declan, attempting to make dinner, getting up all night with him again, and then waking up at 6 to get him ready for the day. While I was adjusting to the insanity, these adjustments meant that I was starting to cheat on Declan a little bit.

I didn't have the sort of energy I wanted to when I came home, and play time with my little buddy was starting to turn into watching him on his play mat while I tried to stay awake. I would get frustrated more easily when he was fussy. I was not enjoying my son like I should have been, and that hit me really hard one day. I can't think of any amount of money that is worth missing my son's first and only babyhood, but what I was getting paid was not even close to making it worth it. Despite the fact that I was getting a discount on childcare, by the time that deduction came out, plus taxes, I was making a little over three hundred dollars every two weeks. Every little bit helps, but for the amount of time and energy that I was putting into the job, the time I was missing with Declan, and the frequency with which Declan was getting sick, it stopped being worth it to me.

So, despite the fact that I already miss the people at Kidz Connection, I am entirely at peace with the decision I made-- that Matt and I both made. On top of everything else, this is Matt's first year running his own classroom full of seventh graders, and that in itself is a monumental task. I know that having someone at home to keep things grounded here (and to keep dinner on the table and dishes out of the sink, haha) is going to be a big help to him.

I've actually had a few people ask me what I'm going to do with all of my spare time now. Hah! That's laughable. Declan is a full time job, and I'll happily take that on. I can't wait to get him on a more regulated schedule. I also can't wait to clean my house, because it hasn't been entirely organized since I started working. I'm also taking grad school classes, so it will be nice to finally be able to focus on those a little more.

Also, as crazy as it is, I'm going to keep trying to make something happen with my writing. I'm in the middle of editing Ridley F. Scott, and hope to have that done by the end of 2012.

The Lord is good, and my strength comes from Him alone. He's been teaching me that joy is not related to happiness, and that perseverance does not come from energy. I'm thankful He never gives up on me.